{Christmas}
“It sounds simple: go outside, step into the quiet, if just for a few minutes, and see what rises to the surface. But we can’t do that! It’s almost Christmas! We must do that. It’s almost Christmas. ” -Emily at Chatting at the Sky
It was all there. The ubiquitous family dynamics annoying everyone. Kids fighting over toys and overwhelmed. Bickering as we got ready for people to come over and not-so-kind looks shot like daggers. Stress and energy zap from the endless stream of events and prep. But the best parts -the bits I want to hold closer to me amongst the things that will never change and that I cannot control:
The quiet in the church as I sat alone in the pew saving seats early
The little boy closest to the microphone belting out Silent Night in off-key perfection that had me grinning
The beautiful manger and the altar covered in a tower of poinsettias
My little one’s excitement to wear a fancy dress
The creamiest Blue Cheese and yummy Smoked Gouda and Linzer Torte cookies
Slow present opening that thankfully didn’t feel at all like a shark feeding frenzy
A nap in the afternoon
Knit mittens lined in fleece that my dad picked perfectly for me
A little guy in his new tool belt and pajamas, hammer in hand all day long
Snuggling under the covers with her long after she fell asleep on my way to bed
It was good, but I’m also glad that it’s over – I always am, it’s all just too much.
Moving Slowly
It’s been such a strange week around here. Sickness making the rounds and general strange unsettling happenings in the world around us seem to be keeping things moving at a slower pace and forcing me to keep things in perspective. We’ve done almost nothing holiday-related this week except to have our friends over for a Christmas brunch. We’ve forgotten to open Advent calendars and take paper chain countdown links off of the chain. We haven’t made any cookies that we planned, we haven’t driven around to look at any lights. I’ve played a little too much Words With Friends(Thanks, Alec) and we’ve watched entirely too much tv while sitting on couches with buckets in our laps. Kids have just been off, even when on the mend from sickness, and I’ve felt beaten down at the end of each day.
Do you know that I feeling I’m talking about? The one that makes you want a nap when the kids take a nap? And makes you feel like you’ve literally been in a fight of sorts at the end of the day from all of the push-and-pull with words while the little ones work out their independence using you as a tool? That combined with sickness and someone who works in a nearby store being robbed at gunpoint in the parking lot while we unknowingly stood just down the street talking. My mom’s friend watching her daughter’s house burn to the ground while she was babysitting her grandchildren. A friend on Facebook posted that her friend was shot and killed by her husband because she was leaving him, leaving behind 3 young sons. I told all of these to a friend and she said her brother just saw someone get robbed last week. And my husband told me that a co-worker just had someone break into their house this week.
I’m not usually a doom and gloom kind of girl. I have a degree in Media Studies and, as a result, tend to stay away from news of all sorts. It’s not to stick my head in the sand, but because I know I can’t change any of it and, for me, filling my head with so much awful creates unnecessary fears and defensiveness. This stuff lately, it’s all just so much sometimes.
But at the end of the day? Down time is kind of just what we needed. No plans, no places to be. Time to fold laundry and simple meals of toast and jam and apples and cheese rather than a frantic last minute Christmas scramble. I’m thankful for that. Hopefully we’ll be all rested up and ready to celebrate holidays joyfully and we can put this week behind us. I’m feeling especially thankful. For the food on our table, for family nearby, for all of our safety, for a husband who loves and respects me and our children, for jobs that allow us to make choices for our family based on what we want.
This is certainly not how I thought I’d be leaving this post before the holidays. But, sometimes real life just happens, you know? You have to roll with the punches. I thought a lot about just staying quiet and laying low for a bit, but it’s cathartic to write it all out. We see so much carefully guarded and planned content on blogs, they deserve to keep it real sometimes. And the celebration of Christmas? The promise of a fresh, new year? They all sound like a breath of fresh air right now, as does this post.
Many many good thoughts to you and yours this holiday season. Hope that you enjoy the small things that make life beautiful as you celebrate with your loved ones!
Holiday Rambling
We spent the weekend hunkered down. It was slightly intentional, in the sense that we planned to not plan much for the weekend. But then we woke up to Nick’s bed full of puke on Saturday morning and that officially meant that we were staying put. Naps both days, a few quick trips out for groceries and last minute supplies to get ready for the week, cooking treats, clearing out 90% of the toys and putting them in the basement(they still haven’t noticed) a lunch date on Sunday and a night out with friends for each of us. It went quickly, but we all walked away well-rested.
We spent last week with a bit more going on, but now preschool is done until the new year. Treats are ready. A few last minute bits and present left to get here in the mail(God Bless Amazon.) Our whole downstairs is finally painted(yay!!) Today is for catching up on laundry and cleaning and getting ready for friends to come over tomorrow and family to come over on Christmas Eve. My biggest excitement today: watching The Holiday while I fold laundry and pick up more, clean the bathroom, put on some Dolly Parton Holiday on Pandora, make some stir fry for dinner. Did you know that you can rent movies on Amazon?? This is the second time I’ve rented The Holiday in the past two weeks. It was between that and Love Actually today, but The Holiday was only $0.99 and Love Actually was $2.99.
It all feels surreal. Do you ever feel like you’re just looking in on your own life? This month has been a complete blur, which is funny since we haven’t actually had tons going on. I planned ahead a lot, it has just felt like one quick blur of a holiday month.For now, we’re relaxing and keeping things as low key as possible.
Merry Making: Ridiculously Easy Salted Toffee
I’ve been seeing different versions of this recipe all over lately. (And I may have made it three different times this week to give as gifts.) But after following recipes the first two times and doing slight variations with crushing the crackers(makes it harder to spread stuff over later), different amounts of white and brown sugar(didn’t notice a difference) and cooking on the stove top, I decided that I wanted less bowls/pots/utensils to wash and less time standing at the stove with boiling caramel while a wild two year old runs around. So I tried having the caramelizing happen in the oven – and it worked! I also lessened the amount of chocolate on top – it really doesn’t need much, but adjust according to what you like. So I decided to cross my fingers on something I thought might work and it turned out so amazingly that I’m seriously considering not giving it away to anyone at all:) Feel free to leave the salt off the top if it’s not your thing, but I’m a sucker for salted anything and any salty/sweet combo, so I chose to use it liberally.
Adapted from this recipe at Frugal Mom and this recipe at baking = love.
Salted Cracker Toffee
-1 sleeve saltine crackers
-2 sticks butter
-1 teaspoon vanilla
-1 cup sugar – I’ve done this with all white sugar, all brown sugar and a half /half mix and didn’t notice much difference, so go nuts with your favorite combo!)
-1 cup chocolate chips
-1.5 teaspoons coarse sea salt
Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Get out a baking sheet of some sort that has a lip(not a flat cookie sheet) and line it with tin foil. Grease the foil. Line up your saltine crackers in single rows on the sheet as tightly as possible. Grab a microwave safe bowl/container of some sort and use it to melt two sticks of butter. Once the butter is melted, stir in vanilla and sugar. Pour the butter/sugar mixture evenly over all of the crackers. Place the tray in the oven and cook for about 11 minutes until you can see that all of the mixture has caramelized – look for the caramel color and keep an eye on it at the end. It’ll change to burning quickly, but you don’t want to take it out too early of the mixture will be more sticky than crunchy(but still insanely delicious). CAREFULLY(seriously, you will burn your arms off if you get this on yourself at this point) take it out of the oven and let it sit on the stove for a minute or 3 until the mixture has stopped bubbling and starts to solidify. While it’s still hot, sprinkle chocolate chips over the top. Let them sit for a minute to melt a bit, then spread them all over the top. Let it set for a few minutes, then sprinkle with coarse sea sealt – just a bit. You could also add fun holiday sugars or sprinkles if you feel especially festive, but if you leave it out I guarantee no one will know the difference!
A few other fun treats that are easy and delicious that I’ve made in the past week-ish that would make great gifts of special treats for the holidays:
-Three Layer Peppermint Bark from Orangette
Merry Making: Candy Cane and Gingerbread Homemade Play Dough
So yesterday? It was a doozy. I looked at the calendar on Wednesday night and realized that we had exactly 3 whole days left from then until Christmas with a blank-calendar-slate where we didn’t have a single place to be between school, my work schedule and normal activities. I had big plans of a holiday-inspired pajama day full of gingerbread houses and Christmas-y play dough and baking treats and hot chocolate. I also had sugarplum dreams of squeezing in cleaning and laundry.
It didn’t really work out.
The two-year-old decided to make it his worst day of the year so far and we spent most of the day with kids screaming and fighting and whining and in time-outs. We finally got to the gingerbread houses by about 4 in the afternoon and nothing else on the list got accomplished. We tried to salvage the day with kids running around naked before bedtime and laying under the tree for a while followed by laying in bed singing Christmas songs together. It helped.
I added this play dough to my list of 50 Things To Do With Kids in December thinking I’d make it in red green and white with glitter, but decided to get a little more crazy with it and instead make Candy Cane play dough. Then I sat down to relax last night and opened Ohdeedoh to find a link to this fun post with gingerbread play dough – BEST IDEA EVER! So maybe it was fate that I didn’t make it yesterday so that I could make the gingerbread version, too??
(Side note – you guys got the memo that we’re not actually doing all of that stuff on the list this month, right? I just started a list and it ran away with me, so I wanted to share to give other people some ideas, too. Not to give the impression that I intend to go on some crazy Christmas binge and squeeze every crazy morsel of unattainable activity level out of the month! Just wanted to make sure we were clear on that:)
The play dough: I made 3 batches of this recipe. One I left white, one I made red and one I made gingerbread. I used a recipe I found in my mom’s recipe box forever ago as the main dough and added other stuff in later. The red batch got food coloring and eucalyptus added into it as it cooked on the stove, the white batch got cooked just plain with the eucalyptus added and the gingerbread batch had the spices added in while it cooked. They all had the glitter added later, though after re-rereading the post from The Creative Mama, it occurred to me that I could have just stirred them in while it was cooking, too. I also could have just made one massive batch of the recipe tripled and added the colors and scents and spices and glitter later. But that would have been too easy…
Basic Play Dough Recipe:
-1 cup Flour
-2 teaspoons Cream of Tartar
-1/2 cup Salt
-1 tablespoon Vegetable Oil
-1 cup Water
-Parchment paper or a clean surface for kneading play dough
-Additions for the candy cane version: red food coloring(it takes a lot), a few drops of a mint oil – peppermint would be nice, red and silver glitter
-Additions for the gingerbread version: 1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice blend, 2 teaspoons cinnamon, 1 teaspoon ground ginger, silver glitter
To Make the Dough:
- Add flour, salt and cream of tartar (plus add-ins for that specific batch, such as food coloring or spices) to a sauce pan and whisk without heat to mix(and save a bowl from getting dirty).
- Put out a piece of parchment paper(or prep a clean, dry area) nearby for cooling and kneading the dough when it’s ready.
- Add oil and water to the dry ingredients.
- Turn heat on medium low and start whisking (make sure you’re ready – once you turn the heat on and start stirring, don’t walk away or stop stirring!)
- Stir until smooth and the mixture starts to thicken.
- When it starts to thicken, turn the heat up a bit to medium and switch to a spatula instead of a whisk for moving dough around.
- Keep cooking the dough until it forms a dough that pulls away from the edges of the pan and no longer has that feeling of gooey wetness to it. I’m assuming that if you’re making this, you’ve played with play dough at some point in your life, so just feel the dough and make sure it has the right texture to work with and isn’t too wet before you take it out.
- Turn the dough out onto the parchment paper and let it cool enough to handle. (It you take it out and it feels too tacky for playing, just put it back in for another minute until the texture feels right.)
- When the dough is cool enough to handle, sprinkle with glitter (Lots! Don’t skimp!), then knead into the mixture until the dough is smooth and all of the glitter is mixed through evenly.
- Play!
The Tree
I’m not going to put on my rose-colored glasses and tell you that it was a perfect day. There was bickering – both John and I and the kids. There was tired crankiness – also from both adults and kids. There were kids diving into boxes of Christmas ornaments that they shouldn’t have been touching and a mama getting beyond frustrated. An intended staple, cozy dinner of chili that sort of missed the mark on the right chili flavor.
But the general sentiment? BEST.CHRISTMAS.DAY.EVER. Seriously. It ranks as one of my most favorite days we’ve ever had, especially together as a family. Going to pick and cut down my own tree has been high on my list of Life Things I’ve Always Wanted to Do. We always had a real tree when I was a kid, but never went and cut it down. I don’t even remember going to pick it, I think one of my parents always brought it home. We have also, in our 8 years together and 5.5 years of marriage, never had a real tree. We’ve had trees, fake trees, and I’ve always been fine with that.
But then my friend Molly told me a few months ago about a tree farm that she and her family visit every year the day after Thanksgiving and take a horse-drawn wagon ride out to the field to pick and cut their own tree and I decided that we were going there.
I originally intended to just go and do the sleigh ride with the kids and visit Santa and see trains and decorations, but a few weeks ago I thought about it and, even though we have our fake tree in the basement, asked John if he’d be up for a real tree. He’s not exactly Mister Optimistic in life. Well, maybe that’s not a fair term. He’s a Realist. Very much so. So when I suggested it, he resisted – it would be cold, messy, we already have a tree, it would fall over, we’d have needles everywhere…
You’ve seen the pictures above. You know he was proven wrong and blown clear out of the water by the awesomeness, right?
We must’ve made eye contact over little jumping-squealing-with-excitement kids’ heads and smiled at least a half a dozen times. That quiet I-Love-Them-So-Much-I-Could-Just-Squeeze-Them smile that I share only with him. The sweetness of it all was not lost on us. The time together. The cold air making cheeks rosy. The laughing at ourselves that we didn’t think logically that we were going out into a field of trees and should’ve worn some footwear that was a little more appropriate. Mittened hands. The wagon ride. The shy smiles when visiting Santa. A barn gift shop with trees and decorations. Wreaths and boughs and red bows. The constant 2-year-old excited squeals of, “YAY! It’s Titmastime!” Stopping at the little restaurant nearby for grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch on the way home. Naps all around. Putting ornaments on the tree. Dinner with the tree lit. Kids asking about each ornament and laying under the tree looking up at the lights.
It was good stuff. Really, really good stuff.
Merry Making : Orange Pomanders and Orange Garland
These are both easy projects and if you’ll be home for a day(the longest part is the orange slices cooking for hours, though it doesn’t require “work”) you could knock both out. I’m not even sure that I really need to post instructions for either of these since you can see in the pictures really, but just in case – I will, but keeping it simple.
Orange Pomanders: Oranges + Whole cloves. Stick the cloves in all around in any sort of pattern, I have yet to see if they’ll actually dry out and not mold, but I’m going to try!
Orange Slice Garland: Stole the idea from here. Slice ‘em up (evenly, please)(also, save the ends and throw them on the stove with some cloves and cinnamon while you go about your business for the day – you won’t regret it), lay them on a towel to dry a bit, spread them out in a single layer on cookie sheets on parchment paper, bake for hours and hours on the lowest heat possible for your oven. They’re done when they’re almost dry but not burnt. Let them cool and string ‘em up!
Some of mine are a tad on the burnt side – don’t judge! I don’t discriminate, they still look fun. Use it to your advantage and don’t do the same with yours.
Happy Merry Making everyone!
A $5 DIY Light Table
I see them all over the place – Light Tables/Light Boxes. But I knew they were expensive and didn’t want to construct something massive to save money, we just don’t have the room. Then I found this post. And kept searching and found this and this. Genius! Especially since I had almost everything I needed already, so it only cost me $5 to buy some of those flat colored gems in a floral department.
Clear bin with a white top(if you don’t have white, you could line it with parchment paper to soften the light) + string of white Christmas lights + big flat clear container on top to contain the fun + gemstones = lightbox!
From the Holiday Weekend
“Sometimes I think of the huge pile of photos that I have and that I’d like to share and tell their stories, and I feel “in debt,” with my blog, with you, with me.
But life is too full and intense to be accumulating unnecessary debts. With people, and with this kind of things.
So I will come to terms with my own times and the fact that I will post the pictures I can, every now and then, the way I always did.” - El mundo de Julie en el mundo
I read that quote this morning and smiled – it struck such personal chord with me because it is my constant. I want to take photographs and I want to share them and blog, but it’s always the first thing that gets put on the back burner amongst the normal life needs. Sometimes I manage to just dump a bunch of photos, but I don’t think you guys come here for just that, do you? I don’t even know. (If you want to see just pics, they’re here.)While we’re chatting, what content excites you around here? What do you wish I would post more?
I’m sitting in a coffee shop with a whole day ahead of me. Writing and catching up on blog stuff and picture shuffling this morning, dropping off packages to send to my sister halfway across the world in Kyrgyzstan, maybe gathering a few last supplies for some more Merry Making and some lunch by myself if I have time. The kids are with my In-Laws to make cookies all morning and I took a deep breath and asked for what I wanted{needed}, hoping not to offend. We were supposed to all make them together, but I needed a break. I worked all weekend and I work in retail and it was Black Friday weekend. So I called and asked if they minded if I just dropped the kids off and spent a few hours alone this morning and they were more than happy to oblige. It’s amazing how easy it is to just ask for what we need, isn’t it? I just forget to do it so often.
I’m beat. And I don’t even work full-time! I shake my head often – I don’t know how people do it. Do people just have gallons more energy than me? Better skills? Better circus juggling abilities? I don’t know, but weekends of working so much have a bittersweet way of making me so much more present in the time we all do have together.
Speaking of Black Friday. I don’t need to say much that wasn’t said all over the place over the past week. But from the perspective of working in the stores, the thing that I just can’t wrap my head around is how people completely and utterly lose.their.minds. Not everyone. My favorite people are the happy groups of women(sometimes with men, too) of a range of ages all out shopping after Thanksgiving together. So excited to be together and to show each other the things that make them delighted. So excited to get a deal and to give the gift. There’s that – and it makes all of the other stuff worth dealing with. But the frenzy? The panic? The need-to-buy-something-anything-right-now-just-for-the-sake-of-buying? I just don’t get it. I watch it regularly, because it’s not just Black Friday and holiday shopping when it happens. I see people all of the time shopping and just wanting to pick something/anything to have the obligatory gift and I can’t stand it. Why on earth even bother to give a gift like that? Isn’t the best part of giving a gift feeling good in your heart? I know it’s not so simple, so black and white. I do. But watching people get mad in parking lots over parking spaces and grumble about not getting an addition $2 off that they mis-calculated in their head and watching them get mad at our employees who are literally 17 years old and made a mistake that I can quickly fix in the register? All for what? It’s just a bunch of stuff! Chill out people!
I pulled up to the house after work last night and the kids were playing outside doing who-knows-what running around with umbrellas – hiding, pretending they were toadstools, taking showers. John was putting up the lights. I wanted to cry. This is the stuff I hate missing. Putting up lights and taking them trick-or-treating and family dinners and putting them to bed so many nights a week. we trade that for me being home during the day and the kids just spending a few hours a week with grandmas in the hours where our work schedules overlap. I’m thankful beyond thankful for that and I know that we choose this and it’s how things need to be for just a while longer. It isn’t forever and my kids are absolutely, positively fine and happy. But my heart just pulls a little when our exchange and choice is to miss out most on the time we have with all four of us together.
So Thanksgiving was nice. It was a day of together and kids happy with grandparents and Aunt and Uncle. Thinking about the traditions we have and how they shape the traditions I want for my children. Appreciation for the ability to spend time at the holidays with family and only have to drive for 10 minutes rather than having to fly across the country. Realizing that we’ve been living back here for longer now than the time we were in Denver – how is that possible??
One last bit – I have a whole lot of links I’ve been saving. Time to share since it’s been a while:
- no regrets (or guilt) this holiday season – AMEN.
- dear pinterest
- a swoon-worthy crate bookshelf
- Crafting Stories with Young Kids – I needed this.
- beautiful ela – (Seriously, every single image he takes makes me catch my breath. So much design inspiration in such a beautiful space – the LIGHT – the architectural details – especially finally finding a real image of what I’ve had in my mind for curtains over/around radiators for our house that I just wasn’t quite sure would work. It will. )
- I am that mom. – Brave, complete honesty.
Hope you are all starting your weeks off with a bit of quiet, too! Or at least fitting in some time for solitude after the bustle. A cup of tea or coffee and a good book are on my agenda big time in the next few weeks. I’m planning to exchange most of my evening computer time for reading in hopes of getting to bed earlier. Especially after next weekend when we put up the tree…
bits of the week : habit
habit , “a place to capture and celebrate the bits of our daily lives.” 1 Picture. 30 words or less. Joining in during the month of November, feel free to link in the comments if you are as well!
Sunday, November 20:
It’s all getting to both of us more than we’d like to admit, but days like today make it all okay. We’ll get there.
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Monday, November 21:
We all get such a kick out of it, I’m so glad Santa decided to deliver her early.
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Tuesday, November 22:
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Wednesday, November 23:
It was just a few minutes, but the cold air felt so good and the stars looked so beautiful. I often feel like the only person who loves winter – I can’t wait.
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Thursday, November 24:
Thankful doesn’t even begin to describe it.
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Saturday, November 26:
I hope I never work another Black Friday. Dinner with them was quiet, we were happy to be together, just us 4. The holiday lights were the icing on the cake.
