These Conversations

We have these conversations. They are our constant.  They usually start with some form of , “So, I was thinking…” and run the gamut from what to have for dinner to what we’ll do this weekend to house projects we need to do to budgeting to wishful thinking to whether or not we’ll actually have another kid and if we did it we’d be able to stay in our two bedroom house with three kids without losing our minds.  They happen most often over the top of little heads amidst chaos and bustle, through doorways and up the stairs while sitting at the table or chopping in the kitchen or washing dishes or sitting behind a laptop. They happen in our strange form of conversation that, most likely, no one else would understand.  Disjointed sentences referring to previous conversations and vague statements that make sense only in the midst of our little family.  We see each other only to say goodbye in the morning and good night in the evening with a brief phone call or email or text here and there to check in more days than not during the week. When all four of us are home together, there’s always the mad dash to try to accomplish things more efficiently than we could if the other were not there and to squish in as much time together as we can. Trying to balance the much-needed down time and the million projects + normal housework is killing us. We both know it, but neither of us has the extra energy to put into making a change. We’re working on it, though. One little bit at a time it’s the story of our life, these little conversations here and there being the constant running through it all.